It’s 10pm, you are in the library staring at your laptop, eyes are red, surviving on instant noodles and a caffeine overload. Your phone lights up “Have you eaten yet?” It’s Mum. Somehow, miles away, she is still thinking and caring about you. It’s moments like these that remind us that no matter how independent we think we’ve become, our parents never stop worrying, never stop loving us. In Islam, their place in our lives is of utmost importance.
Duties Towards Parents in Islam
Allah tells us in the Qur’an: “And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to parents.”
— [Surah Al-Isra 17:23]
Immediately after commanding us to worship Him, Allah reminds us to honour our parents. That pairing is no coincidence, it shows how immense their rights are. As students, whether we’re living away or still at home, it’s easy to get caught up in deadlines, social life, and everything else. Distance isn’t just physical, you can live in the same house and still feel miles apart when you’re drowning in assignments. But Allah calls us to remember the ones who sacrificed the world for us.
Why We Can Never Repay Them
No matter what we do, we can never fully repay our parents. Ibn Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) beautifully explained this when asked a question:
Abu Burda reported that Ibn Umar watched a Yemeni man circling the Ka’bah whilst carrying his mother on his back. The man asked, “O Ibn Umar, do you think I have repaid her?” Ibn Umar said, “No, not even for a single pang of pregnancy.”
— Al-Adab Al-Mufrad by Imam Bukhari (Chapter 6 Hadith 11)
Our mothers endured pain before we were even born. Our fathers worked tirelessly so we could have everything that we needed, often hiding their struggles so we wouldn’t worry. Every meal they cooked, every time they drove us somewhere, every “it’s fine don’t worry”. Allah doesn’t even expect us to repay it all. He just wants us to be grateful and kind. Our Essentials course here at Roots Academy helps to build those characteristics within us, as part of our overall spiritual development.
5 Simple Ways to Be Dutiful to Parents (Even as a Busy Student)
It’s easy to feel overwhelmed or guilty, especially when we’re away from home. But being dutiful doesn’t have to be complicated. Here are five simple ways we can show love and respect even from afar.
Call them regularly
A two-minute phone call might mean nothing to us, but it could make their entire day. Let them hear your voice. Ask them how they’re doing, not just “how long until dinner “when you’re home again.
Duas from the Quran for your parents
After every prayer, make a supplication: “My Lord, have mercy upon them as they raised me when I was small.” (Qur’an 17:24) It costs nothing, but its reward is found in this world and the hereafter.
Tell them what you’re learning
University is full of lessons — academic, social, and spiritual. Share that with them. If you’re attending Islamic classes or lectures (like a Roots workshop), pass that knowledge on. Sometimes, the best gift is sharing what brings you closer to Allah together.
Helping parents financially, even in small ways
Whether it’s sending them money occasionally (your mother might have been eyeing up a new handbag) or treating them to dinner when you’re home, little acts of generosity go a long way. It’s not the amount — it’s the thought that says, “You’ve done so much for me, let me do something for you.”
Make them smile
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said “Smiling in the face of your brother is charity.” If this is the reward for the brother, imagine the reward for making your parents smile. Send them a random memory, tell them a joke, or simply thank them for something they did years ago.
A Simple Reminder
The Prophet (peace be upon Him) said: “The Lord’s pleasure is in the parent’s pleasure, and the Lord’s anger is in the parent’s anger”
— Jami’ At-Tirmidhi (Vol. 4, Book 1, Hadith 1899)
Being Better With Your Parents: Making a Change
University life is hectic. Between essays, deadlines, and your friends, it’s easy to forget the ones whose supplications got you here in the first place. Islam reminds us that honouring our parents isn’t just a cultural thing, it’s an act of worship.
So tonight, when your phone vibrates, don’t just reply with “yeah, I ate.” Take a second. Thank them. Tell them you love them. Tell them you miss them. Make them laugh. For every time we’ve fallen short, maybe that laughter is a small way of making up for it.
Sometimes, paradise lies not in what we achieve, but in how we treat the ones who raised us.
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For further advice around topics such as these, make sure to check out our podcast and explore our in-person Islamic classes near you.